Tuesday, 8th April 2008
Not just a plea for forgiveness
Last weekend we lived through the beautiful and the ugly side of the church's social and charitable service to the community.
The diocese of Malta celebrated Charity Sunday. The faithful were asked to contribute to the charitable work of the Church. They regularly give generously as it is well known that throughout the years thousands have found solace and love in the shelters and homes of the church in both the Maltese as well as the Gozitan diocese. Hundreds still do every year.
At the same time the Bishop of Gozo, Mgr Mario Grech, faced a different reality. There were instances when those who sought the solace and love so warmly given in the ordinary course of the church'e life in these insitutions were bitterly disappointed. Bishop Grech sorrowfully but courageously announced that an independent commission he set up had concluded that in past decades a number of abuses were committed at Lourdes Home in Gozo. He also publicly asked for forgiveness.
Bishop Grech has shown that he is ready to face reality the way it is, warts and all. As soon as it was announced, two years ago, that Bondi+ would discuss alledged abuses at Lourdes Home Mgr Grech set up an independent commission. A retired judge, a lawyer, a psychologist and a Maltese priest were asked to investigate. They did, leaving no stone unturned. They concluded that physical and psychological abuses had happened at Lourdes home during the two or three decades they investigated. The Christian community should be grateful to the members of the Commission for their work.
Resolve not to repeat
Bishop Grech was not the bishop of Gozo when these incidents happened. Probably he was just a young priest. One could make the case -which is true - that the number of children who were helped at Lourdes Home was exceeded by far the number of those hurt. It could be said - and this is also true - that only a tiny percentage of the sisters who served these children betrayed their trust. Bishop Grech presented none of these excuses or reasons - whichever way you look at them. He unconditionally asked for forgiveness.
But he did not stop at asking forgiveness. "I immediately contacted the Superior General of the Dominican Sisters, and instructed her to carry out the Commission's recommendations, thus excluding the recurrence of such abuses."
Repentance without the resolve not to repeat is no repentance at all. Many asked, and I think legitimately so, about the content of these recommendations. Bishop Grech decided not to make them public. He could have done so. Perhaps he should have done so. His decision not to do so means that the cross will stay squarely on his shoulders more than on those of any other. He took upon himself more responsibility than he was bound to take. But isn't this the mettle that true shepherds are made of?
On the other hand, Church practice in several parts of the world indicates what these recommendations - or some of them at least - must be. Standard church policy is that those who are guilty of abusing minors will not be allowed to work with minors - anywhere. Past are the days when abusers were transferred from one place to another, perpetuating abuse. Another recomendation usually states that abusers should be helped to heal themselves psychologically and spiritually. They have a right for this help as well as our love.
Helping those abused
The other side of the coin is made of those who needed help in their vulnerability but found abuse instead. The wide-spread scepticism they encountered will have aggravated rather than alleviated the abuse they had to bear. For years these vulnerable persons were considered to be liars and detractors. They weren't. One hopes that the begging for forgiveness by Bishop Grech will be part of their process of healing.
The bishop promised more. "The Church wants to accompany these persons who were hurt by this behaviour. I have already appointed a team of experts who will accompany these persons in this healing process. I have already made contacts with the persons involved and will be closely following this process."
Their process of healing can only be complete when they find it in themselves the strength to forgive those who hurt them.
Weakness, love and dedication
Up to the point of writing, on Monday evening - three days after the publication of the statement of Bishop Grech - the Dominican Sisters have not made any public statement. It must be a very sad period for these sisters as it is for all church members. A grave injustice would be committed if the Dominican Sisters in Malta and Gozo are portrayed as if they are a bunch of monsters. They definitively aren't. The Dominican Order has given this country - and surely will continue to give - sterling service. Old and young testify to this service.
Bishop Grech, in his statement, appreciatied "the sterling work done with great love and dedication by a great number of Dominican Sisters in this Home, during its long history in favour of hundreds of children and their families. ... .. Many other children, now adults, attest to the fact that they had experienced love and tender care in this Home."
The abundance of good work they did, its appreciation by the Bishop and the community should provide the Dominican Sisters with the needed strength to emulate the courage shown by Bishop Grech. Like him they should ask for forgiveness, assure all and one that the Commission's recommendation are being put in practice and resolve to keep giving more service to the community through Lourdes Home and their many other most valuable pastoral and charitable work.
One cannot let human frailty obfuscate and eliminate the good that can and need be done even tomorrow.
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Comments
Whilst this may very well be the case, this can also be the Stockholm syndrome. If it is, at least for some, the problem is much bigger than everyone is saying it is!
May i also add that in all this, I still admire the way Mgr Grech handled the very difficult 'situation'.
I read Miriam Borg's comment. No amount of words anyone says will ever erase this lady's experiences. However, we - the Church - are one body with one head, so in unision with the rest of the apologies, I too offer my apologies to Ms. Borg for the unexcusable circumstances she had to suffer.
And here I would add that while the Media who brought to light these actions are to be thanked because it is what spurred the Bishop for an independent commission, now, that same Media should be cautious on how to proceed. If there really should be legal proceedings, the Media should keep it’s distance from revealing, at least, who the victims were—they have suffered enough.
What got me to write these comments was not Fr. Borg’s article or what was brought to light. It was Charlie Galea’s comments on Frank Galea’s comments. I do agree with Charlie that Frank could have written in simpler English. It was the way he tried to denigrate Frank and what he said that I do not agree with. And Charlie, do you realize that you are being racist towards the Gozitans by stating that after all the incident happened in Gozo? Are you insinuating that the Gozitans are stupid and cannot open a dictionary if they cannot understand a word? I’m sure that if a Gozitan can open a blog on the Internet and read Frank’s comments they can also use a dictionary or thesaurus. Yes, I agree that one would want an apology if he is forced to eat one’s own vomit, but I also agree that forgiveness should not be limited to receiving forgiveness from the victim, as I write above. As for forgiveness from God, again, since we live in a society, forgiveness from God should not be the last word, hence legal justice. A Catholic man commits a crime punishable within this society and guilt stricken goes to confession. He is absolved. Even so, he still has to be brought to justice to pay his dues to society.
after all this incident took pllace in Gozo.
Oh yes your comment the transferring of the onus of forgiveness on to the victim which is a prevaricarious con these comment would have got a good laugh like the rest of your letter if this incident wasn't so tragic . I am sure you would want an appology if someone forced you to eat your own vomit.
However, I also feel that a plea for forgiveness should not only be directed to the media, but should be personally directed towards the victims of this period of abuse.
While I also agree with Borg with regard to the Dominican Order, I feel that even here, there should be a public plea of forgiveness which should also be directed towards the victims themselves.
Many people know how Religious Orders work - I have every respect for them, but superiors, especially up to recently, used to have certain ways of how to handle problematic members of their religious orders.
For instance, problematic religious members used to be bundled up and sent to the Missions. There, they used to think, everything would be accepted, unlike in civilised society.
So, I really think that what may have really happened was that the problematic people within the Order of Dominicans may have been known to the Superiors, yet these always closed either one or both, eyes.
A pity, really.
For those who are Catholics, forgiveness emanates from God. That is the Cathecism I was taught when I was young, and no fancy academic with an axe to grind has any right to preach otherwise without being confuted.
Thank you, YE, for showing the way to those that want to behold it.
Unfortunately, this phenomenon happens around the world and throughout all religious denominations. It is reprehensible and should never have taken place.
The sad part about all this, is the fact that very often the perpetrators are either dead or too old to even bother to prosecute. The ones who are prosecuted and found guilty are jailed but the financial obligations towards the victims' compensation or counseling are thrown in the church's lap and in many cases dioceses have been rendered bankrupt and church buildings had to be sold in order to raise funds to meet these court imposed obligations.
These crimes are committed by the 'preachers of the gospel' which make the offences even more reprehensible.
Yes, we are all human and subject to frailities which sometimes contribute to our miserable behaviour, but surely, if we keep remembering our Maltese saying "sin never sleeps" it should be a constant reminder that sooner or later we pay, whether in this world or the next.
Bishop Grech, may have started a much needed healing process for the victims of these unthinkable acts and should be thanked for his courageous act.