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HIATUS ENDED

Apologies for the span of time between this blog and its predecessor. The thing about this sort of publication is that it's not deadline-driven, so you can let the days slip by with nothing serious happening, other than one's fans getting withdrawal symptoms.

Actually, the fact that comments keep coming in sort-of justifies leaving the thing in place. You can't really deprive people like Said or Buttigieg an outlet for their frustration at Labour's third (or is it fourth? I lose count) electoral defeat in a row.

I mean, if they kept it all bottled up, the consequences are unthinkable. Still, here you are, some more idle rambling for your delectation.

Alfred Sant is the Leader of the Opposition, and as such, he made a speech in the House responding to the President's summation of the Government's agenda. It was almost breathtaking.

Sant's speech, I mean - the President's was quite a standard piece of work.

According to the Leader of the Opposition Not Any Longer the Leader of the MLP, aliens are inflitrating, incumbents are usurping, foreigners are voting and, for all I know (I didn't manage to get through the whole thing, there are limits to my powers of concentration) Robert Mugabe was the Chairman of the Electoral Commission, all of which led to the PN filching the elections from the hands of the deserving MLP.

No mention was made by Sant of his contribution to Labour's amazing feat. Snatching defeat from the jaws of victory, if you'll forgive my descent into hoary old ones, is putting it mildly. All they had to do was turn up, if the pre-campaign polls are to be believed but they managed to pull off something of a miracle and the man at the helm when all this went down just stood there, pointing fingers at everyone else.

Far be it for a gentleman to kick a man when he's down, but he has to be down for a gentleman to behave like one and Sant thought it would be a good idea not to adopt the position.

What is it with this guy? Did the standing ovation orchestrated at the MLP National Conference last Friday, presumably to put the fear of God into George Abela, convince him that, hey, he's not to blame after all. If this goes on much longer, we're going to start thinking his middle name is Frank.

WARBLES

On Wednesday eveing, as far as I know, the Eurovision Song Contest Semi-final was about to get underway. I might, of course, be completely wrong, for all that the recent ads for this blog in the print edition of this news portal portray me as an expert.

The ad, as all clever ads are, is designed to pique your interest - the slight snag is that bloggering being the dynamic exercise that is, by the time you see the ad, the blog has gone the way of all things virtual. So if you want to read what I really wrote about the Eurovision thingy, you'll have to look at the archive, conveniently sited below the comments that are below the blog.

What is it about this particular song contest that so excites the populace at large? It's a pop-song contest, for Heaven's sake, about as important in the greater scheme of things as the consistency of pop-corn or the temperature of Dr Pepper.

Actually, the temperature of a can of that specific nectar is something of great pith and moment: too tepid and it's not quite the thing. Incidentally, might I impose on the vast knowledge of the people who comment whenever I write something and ask who imports Dr Pepper?

I merely seek enlightenment out of idle curiosity. Back to the warble-fest, why is it that it is taken so seriously? When Malta's entry, irrespective of its merits, gets ploughed, as generally happens, interminable inquests are undertaken, and in particularly bad years, we even get a Xarabank or a Bondi+, if not both, dedicated to establishing the cause of the national shame that has befallen us.

A more significant indicator of the portentiousness of the situation would be hard to find. It's as if Larry King had taken his braces back from Bondi, teamed up with Adam Boulton and summoned Paxman front and central to investigate the downfall of the Roman Empire. Read my lips, people: this is frippery. It is so unimportant that only people without a life take it seriously.

Talons are bared and careers blighted only because worlds are so devoid of substance that the Eurovision Song Contest becomes the be-all and end-all of life, the universe and everything.

Let me be clear, I'm not denying the young Morena her time in the spotlight. I hope she has the time of her life and, only becuase it's nice to see people happy, I hope she gets on fine. In fact, I hope she wins, though the extent to which this will do any good to PBS's finances is debatable at best.

But please, and I ask in the full knowledge that it will not happen, can we please just give her a pat on the back when she gets back, with perhaps a "better luck next time, hon"?

Fat chance.

DEPRESSING COMEDY

While working on this, I was watching an hour of so-called comedy on the BBC and, verily, it was a depressing experience. The shows that were on were "Ever Decreasing Circles" and "Keeping up Appearances". The former is premised on an anally-retentive suburbanite who abhors change and seems to have taken control-freakery to depths previously undreamt of in human endeavour.

As if that isn't enough, following on is the Bucket woman, another suburbanite with aspirations and moral standards lower than the lowest of grasping hookers. The only thing that could make the evening worse would be a double bill of "Some Mother do 'Ave 'Em" to follow.

MAN, YOU ARE

OK, so Man U got the better of Wigan and Chelsea failed to put 20 past Bolton, meaning that the lads in red bucked the trend set here last March, denying the valiant boys in blue a last-ditch victory and an upset of the first water. Man U's shame is the same as the MLP's, with the rather important distinction that the latter didn't make it, while the former, for all their efforts to try and kick what seemed to be a racing cert in the teeth, actually made it.

It wasn't Bill Shankly, apparently, who said that football isn't life and death, it's way more important, but he was wrong. Man U winning the Premiership last Saturday was such a non-event that I was almost not going to mention it.

My tune will, of course, be ever so slightly different when Chelsea win the European Champions League next Wednesday.

(Editorial Note: given the seriousness with which things are taken in this country, it might be a good idea to point out that tongues are securely lodged in cheeks on occasion)

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Comments

Joe Martinelli (on 18/5/08)
@ Charles J Buttigieg

Charles - don't get too friendly lest some strange rumour will spread around.

You asked whether you got it right?

You would be right if you had your own blog but I understand that you respond to someone else's - so that makes you a Flogger since I have rarely caught you agreeing with ABC.

BTW your response to Jo Said revealed that you are no painter. You realize that mixing red and green will give you yellow while the so-so mix (as you put it) of red and blue produces a rich purple!
Fleur Hili (on 17/5/08)
Since I have no particular interest in Eurovision and football, I have to comment on the Dr.Pepper issue. The said drink is now available in BOTTLES and it tastes so much better just like "the real thing".
I guess it is because it is imported from the UK not some unforeseen country like the cans. :-)

Keep blogging ABC I love it!!!!
Charles J Buttigieg (on 17/5/08)
@my real friend Joe Martinelli.
Good on you Joe,thanks for the free lesson. If I understood correctly that will make me and my red friends bloggers and my blue friends floggers. Isn't that right? Now tell me Joe,what do they call unbiased people like you? Humorists maybe? Enjoy the weekend old chap,I intend to even if ABC tries to upset me.
@Jo Said feel free to call me sometime, I am not far from Selmun and my name is in the book.Red and green mix well,blue and red so and so.
Michael Debono (on 17/5/08)
Before writing about Dr.A.Sant, ABC visits "Mandraggio" in spirit and dips his pen in it; only in spirit not in essence (spirit-=essence chemically speaking). There is nothing hidden between the lines.The writing means what it says
Joe Martinelli (on 17/5/08)
@ Charles J Buttigieg

Charles, being a totally unbiased person, I would like to humbly answer your last question in your latest posting.

"Blogger" is someone who writes about an idea or his opinion on any subject he choses and publishes it for others to read, analyze, agree or disagree.

"Flogger" is one who automatically finds fault and tries to inflict hurt on the blogger, just to prove how much smarter he (or she) is.

Then there is the "Prodder" who takes umbrage with the Flogger and tries to straighten him up while usually siding with the Blogger's arguments.

I hope this helps a little and remember, keep smiling, every morning we wake up to is a brand new day with a million new possibilities and opportunities for which we all should be thankful.
MARK MIFSUD BONNICI (on 17/5/08)
Your comment in NOW magazine states that you are opposed to all hunting FOR THIS REASON:

"I don't think that the killing animals is an activity that should be accepted any longer in a civilised society"

Yet in your article you mention the avocado and CHICKEN your missus ordered.

I guess the chicken she ordered must have died of natural causes. That's called hypocrisy.

Joe Vella (on 17/5/08)
@ Charles J. Buttigieg

Charles, there is nothing wrong with individuals changing how they vote. As a matter of fact Democracy survives because of it. What is wrong is when indiviuals change thier vote for ulteriour personal reasons. Even, in this case I see nothing wrong. What is wrong is that one not being honest with oneself and take Society as a FOOL; by NOT justifying his action to Society with the REAL reason(s) as he is doing so.

Jo Said (on 17/5/08)
@ John Schembri - thank you.....you are so kind.
Charles J Buttigieg (on 17/5/08)
Blue opinion writers,editorials,bloggers and people in the street are gratuitously offering advice to Labour on how to swing support from Gonzipn to the Labour side.(sic) Here we have a voter who turned his coat from blue to green and yet is being ridiculed. My favourite colour is red,if I become a turncoat to increase the Gonzipn majority to 1501 would I be threaded akin to Jo Said by these crusaders? Incidentally,is the term bloggers or floggers?
John Schembri (on 17/5/08)
@ Jo Said : literally translated Spizjar is a Pharmacist not a chemist.
Leonard Gauci (on 16/5/08)
@Andrew Borg-Cardona – perhaps Jo Said means something along the lines of Eric Cantona’s "when the seagulls follow the trawler, it is because they think sardines will be thrown into the sea". Whatever that meant.
laurence schembri (on 16/5/08)
If there is something that I like about you is, that you are a Chelsea supporter, my two Mobiles answer to the tune of `Blue is the Colour`, older than you I guess. I`ve followed the Blues for the past 50 years, glutton for punishment you would say.
laurence schembri (on 16/5/08)
@ Leonard Gauci, nice one, I bet that will keep his gob shut.
Joe Vella (on 16/5/08)
@ Andrew Borg-Cardona

I think Jo Said is looking for a Government appointment; and wanted to know where to go.

lol
Andrew Borg-Cardona (on 16/5/08)
@ALL (except Jo Said) If anyone can decipher what Said has written and has the energy to let the rest of us know, be my guest. I, for one, am not going to bother answering him any longer.
Jo Said (on 16/5/08)
So so true...patience is a virtue. But unhappiness just isn't. Literally translated from Maltese, the chemist gives you of what he or she has. So so true. What was the subject?
Andrew Borg-Cardona (on 16/5/08)
@Cecily Grech - nah, that was the old, tubby me ... :)
@David Atkin - just kidding ... made you sit up and take notice, though, didn't it?
@Jo Said - stop trying to kid everyone that you give a damn about anyone or anything except for what seems to be your obsessive need to get your name in the media. Why not see if any media organisation will take a column and blog from you three times a week? Then we can have fun sniping at you.
Jo Said (on 16/5/08)
Let's mix politics with football, if you will. It seems to be the trait, locally, anyway - NP 3 MLP 0. So we are supposed to chant 'threeenil...threeenil...so there' . It's like humpty dumpty (!) who sat on a wall. He did not learn anything from his great fall - not his party's or club's, but HIS fall. His PNfc are setting new records of wins, and climbing new heights, soaring like an eagle above the humble, the desolate and the needy. - ''are those ants down there, Bertie?'' THAT is the most important priority in Boccia's life. It does not matter how his calan achieves it. What matters for ABC and his ilk is that their party wins, irrespectively and none-the-less(ly). God forbid had there to be a hiatus. Otherwise the Kordin facility would have to ask for more funds from the taxpayer to buy more hard mattresses, if you get my drift. In short it's like THE EIGHTIES REVISITED, but hellishly refined. And here is the irony of yours truly, Boccia lauds Chelsea and so does Jo Said. The only difference when we both pull our hair in delirium for our team, is the size of our blue shirt. Life's a bitch, aint it mate?
David Atkin (on 16/5/08)
please oh please do not compare my beloved Man Utd to the Malta Labour Party ever again!
Cecily Grech (on 15/5/08)
Just saw yr comment - can't help replying..... you asked for the diet version in a previous blog!
Victoria Grech (on 15/5/08)
Slow on the uptake, aren't you Bocc?

Joseph Bilocca (on 15/5/08)
Hi Andrew,
Surprised to see you mention that Man Utd winning the Premiership was "such a non-event" for the 17th time!!!!!!!!!
Gosh, you must be feeling the blues....that badly????
Ciao...
Leonard Gauci (on 15/5/08)
P.S. What made you think I live in Argentina?
Reuben Sciberras (on 15/5/08)
Hi Boċċa, I don't know if I got it right or not - and I'm sure if I did not, I will be summarily reprimanded - but it was indeed one of the great football managers of all time, Bill Shankly who said "Some people think football is a matter of life and death. I assure you, it's much more serious than that."
Leonard Gauci (on 15/5/08)
perhaps, and things do get a bit blurred with the intake of beer ... but I'm quite sure it was Sunday
Martin Borg (on 15/5/08)
Hi Bocca,
Glad to see you have recovered from last Sunday's Chelski letdown. However, I take great umbrage at your equating Man U with the MLP. How can you ever (even in your wildest dreams) put the greatest team in the galaxy (together with Valletta FC of course) in the same category as that bunch of serial losers down Mileend way.

Thanks for answering my prayer and once again predicting a win for the boys in Blue next Wednesday. Safe in the knowledge of your predictive powers I shall sleep more soundly tonight.
Andrew Borg-Cardona (on 15/5/08)
@Victoria Grech - again - why are you addressing I M Beck when talking to me, anyway?
Andrew Borg-Cardona (on 15/5/08)
@Leonard Gauci - as someone who lives in a country where they play football with their hands, you have little credibility on matters footballing...
@Victoria Grech - a thousand and one apologies, I thought you were someone else, a notion of which I have been roundly disabused
@Cecily Grech - many thanks, I'll seek them out ... why do you think I would need the diet version?
laurence schembri (on 15/5/08)
A lapse maybe. Never mind Boulton, Paxman or Larry...brace yourself...Terry Wogan,
Leonard Gauci (on 15/5/08)
last Saturday? missed ... again
Victoria Grech (on 14/5/08)
Dear I.M. BECK

It has come to my attention that you have placed these thingies " " around my name when you replied to my post about that small thing of Man U winning the title... Who would use a pseudonym on a news site, ej?

Best regards,

Victoria Grech
Cecily Grech (on 14/5/08)
As far as I know Scotts Supermarket import Dr. Pepper themselves and if you are interested in the diet version they are awaiting a consignment of Dr Pepper Zero.

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