Having just removed the egg on his face which he earned as a result of the ‘sale of passport’ debacle, the Prime Minister looks into the mirror and exclaims:

“I am so pretty and so photogenic! And I am not proud at all, as I have been made to understand what a hash the citizenship scheme was that I steamrolled through Parliament with such haste (if only my Home Affairs Minister would put a foot right!).

“I have now consulted the stakeholders (those that were standing by my side during the photo-op, although only two represented their organisations). And look what a marvellous scheme I now present, resulting in more money in the kitty as I have raised the ‘sale price’.

“That will ensure that we get the talented people which this country lacks.

“And next time round my Finance Minister will be able to impress the people in Brussels and recuperate our tarnished reputation.

“And I take full responsibility for the whole mess, but I will not resign, as that only happens in a civilised democratic country.”