With the international break a distant blur in the rear-view mirror, football’s focus returns to the domestic scene and, looking ahead to this weekend’s fixtures, one game jumped out and slapped you in the face.

Surprisingly I’m not talking about the clash between Sheffield United and Birmingham – although because I’ve said that it will probably have been a 6-6 classic – but rather this afternoon’s Manchester derby at the Etihad.

After their car crash of a start to the season, United have begun to find their Ten Hag feet, with four league wins in a row following dismal defeats to Brentford and Brighton that left them rooted to the bottom of the league. They aren’t yet anything close to the finished product, and I still suspect they will have a few painful dips in form over the season, but the first green shoots of recovery are starting to show.

City, on the other hand, are a Haaland-powered steamroller. They may be second in the league table at the time of writing, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t destined to walk away with title. But, and this is a big but, they do have an Achilles heel – their defence.

While the midfield and attack are so good at times you want to spontaneously stand up and applaud, their defence is not impenetrable – they’ve conceded three goals on three occasions already this season.

If, by some miraculous jiggery pokery, United can hold off the attacking onslaught and apply some pressure to a back line that is going to be even less solid without the injured John Stones, a surprise may just be possible.

But I suspect United, despite their recent improvement, won’t have the courage to try and take the game to their city rivals. They will probably go defensive and aim for containment. And that, normally, plays into City’s hands.

Unlike other teams, Pep Guardiola’s boys always seem to find a way to break down opponents who come to park the bus. Few teams have a bus big enough for the job, or know where they need to park it.

If United do try to hold them off for 90 minutes, we are probably looking at a comfortable, Haaland-inspired victory for the blue half of Manchester.

If they don’t, then we are still probably looking at a comfortable, Haaland-inspired victory for the blue half of Manchester.

We are probably looking at a comfortable, Haaland-inspired victory for the blue half of Manchester

But at least it would be a bit more entertaining for us neutrals.

Marketing magic

Oh, my word, I love to see genius at work.

Denmark launched their special World Cup kits last week with all the badges and branding “toned down” to protest against Qatar’s human rights record and the country’s treatment of migrant workers. So essentially all the kits the team will be using in Qatar have both the Danish badge and the kit provider’s logo faded until they are barely visible.

Of course, I am not going to disagree with the messaging behind this move. Highlighting some of the issues in Qatar is a very worthy gesture. But is it not just slightly possible this is also a brilliant and cunning marketing ploy?

I have seen so many people talking about the Danish kits on social media over the past few days, many of them who don’t even like football, saying they are going to get their hands on one of these replica kits to support the cause. (Three new kits, by the way, because you really need three different coloured outfits for a handful of games…)

All in all, it’s a perfect winning loop: the Danes and kit manufacturers Hummels can both claim the moral high ground. The issues they are highlighting in Qatar get more exposure as more people buy kits and talk about why they are doing so. And the Danish FA and Hummels get to see the money roll in, all while looking ethically perfect.

Someone in the Hummel’s marketing team needs a big, fat pay rise.

One man, no clue

Here’s what really makes my teeth itch: it appears the only person who can’t see what’s wrong with the current England team is the one man whose job it is to see it.

I can see it; my other England supporting friends can see it; young football fans who are not allowed to stay up late enough to watch the games can see it. Heck, I suspect my wife, who is increasingly numb to the entire concept of football, would see it if she could be bothered to tolerate 90 minutes England drivel.

Yet Gareth Southgate is oblivious to what is staring him right in the face. So let me give him a little clue: when England play defensively, they suck, but when they attack, they are actually rather good.

Does that help you out at all, Gareth?

This man has been in charge of England for many years now, but the stark reality of that situation still seems to elude him. Either that, or he is too busy thinking up his next batch of woke sound bites to see what is repeatedly panning out in front of him.

This England team is blessed with attacking skill, speed, flair and talent. At the other end of the pitch, however, the blessings are a little thinner on the ground.

Southgate insists on trying to mask the defensive problems by stifling the attacking flair, and that is a tragic error.

If the manager has the courage to unleash this team and cast off the shackles, they can still win this World Cup. If he doesn’t, I don’t think he will be in a job by Christmas.

Winning against the odds

Malta pulled off a super victory over Israel last Tuesday despite the odds being stacked against them.

Not only are Israel nearly 100 places above us in the FIFA rankings, the game was also played against the backdrop of ongoing turmoil within the camp.

With head coach Devis Mangia suspended by the MFA after being reported for alleged sexual misconduct, assistant manager Davide Mazzotta took charge of the friendly. But despite pre-match preparations being very far from ideal, Malta came from behind to pull off a deserved 2-1 victory with late goals from Satariano and Apap.

It was a performance of guts, perseverance and determination, qualities that have become much more prevalent in the team in recent years, ironically since Mangia took over.

Obviously, we need to see how the whole allegation situation plays out, with the plot thickening by the day, but full credit to the Maltese players for not letting off-field issues affect their on-field performance when it would have been very easy to use it as an excuse.

 

E-Mail: James@quizando.com

Twitter: @Maltablade