I.M. Beck - Quote unquote

When I read about Doctor Alfred Sant, I sometimes have three questions popping into my mind. The first is "is he trying for the prize of most arrogant politician"? The second is "is he trying for the prize of most Byzantine politician"? The third is "is he trying for the prize of most naïve politician?"

Who other than someone who thinks he knows it all, all the time, would be presumptuous enough to think he has the right to dictate to the Prime Minister that it is time for him to have a Cabinet shuffle? It's sometimes heard of that the leader of the opposition calls for one or the other minister to be replaced or removed or whatever but to put on a smug look and tick off 23 reasons why the whole flipping lot of them should be moved around is arrogance of the first water.

On the other hand, is it? Perhaps Doctor Alfred Sant figures that the best way to ensure that something is not done is for him to suggest that it should be. Perhaps Doctor Alfred Sant figures that if the current crop of ministers is kept in office, he has more than a snowball's hope in hell to become prime minister himself in due course. You know what I mean, the same sort of reverse-psychology that keeps the Nationalists baying for him to be changed as leader of the MLP because they know full well that he's their best card in the game.

And then there's the consideration, such as it is, that Doctor Alfred Sant genuinely believes that he does know best and that he, and only he, can see the writing in the tea-leaves. Given his own record in government, this is naïvety of the most stupendously marvellous levels.

So, which is it? Arrogance, Macchiavellism, silliness? A combination of all three?

The sad truth is, whichever of the above or all of the above, all of them make him singularly unsuited to be prime minister whenever, in a few years' time, the Prime Minister exercises one of the prerogatives democracy has left him, that of calling an election.

Which means, ironically, that my surmising that the Nationalists' plan to keep Doctor Alfred Sant at the helm of the MLP is not completely out there in left field, I do think.

Do be clear

Let's carry on with the dear fellow for a bit, shall we? Doctor Alfred Sant, I mean. He's now going about saying he never said that human rights can be suspended in the national interest. Apparently, what he said was that when the national interest so requires, in an emergency context, human rights can be looked at from another angle.

Perhaps this wasn't exactly what he said, but the man has such a capacity for weaving the weft and warp of words that I have trouble following him completely. It's my fault I have such a badly filled cerebellum, of course.

So, human rights will be safe in the MLP's hands, then, will it?

That's good to hear, even though you will forgive me, a child of the 1970s and 1980s, from having this nagging feeling that I should be writing something on the lines of "I'll believe that when I see it", not because I have any real doubts about Doctor Alfred Sant's personal democratic credentials, it's just that he has such a penchant for pushing the buttons marked "opportunity for advantage" that I have to keep pushing the ones marked "alarm" on my part.

After all, Doctor Alfred Sant has to pander to the yobs within his party who believe that illegal immigrants should be shot (as long as they're not white, of course, the lap-dancers from eastern Europe remain safe) so he has to keep saying things like "people who incite racism without basis should be restrained".

When is incitement to racist hatred OK, then, Doctor Alfred Sant? When is there a basis for it to be acceptable? When such incitement favours the Labour Party?

I don't think that's what you meant, but for heaven's sake, be clear on this, if on nothing else, once and for all.

Is the Malta Labour Party, with you at the helm, going to continue to demand that Malta will act as a civilised member of the community of nations or is the Malta Labour Party, with you at the helm, going to sit on the fence and try to get the votes, such as they are, of the disaffected few who think that the colour of people's skin and their country of origin gives them less of a right to be treated decently?

Come on, no pussyfooting on this: are you going to be clear?

Squirming under the stone

Just so that the Farrugias, Seychells, Baldacchinos and Mercieqas, to use some fictitious names plucked at random, of this world don't feel that they are neglected losers about whom I don't care anymore, I am going to quote a few words from the spiritual leader of the Revoltingly Racist Rabid Right, Mr Norman Lowell.

Asked, on their website, for the Hero's wise words on trade "come the Imperium", he wrote, in the verse form that he has made his own, as below.

Just so you can understand what he's on about, Europids (as far as I can make out) are the whites and they will live in the Imperium, a fast approaching (according to Lowell) Federation of Dominiums from which any non-Europids will be expelled and with whom trade will be restricted as Lowell writes below.

"We will only barter Food with non Europids - nothing else!/Food for whatever we want./If they don't have it: they go on a long diet!

"We will barter our Food:/with whoever it suits us:/ with whoever has what we want.

Barter with "outsiders":/will be a last resort./Dire necessity, rather than mere trade.

"Within a few years:/we will witness the disappearance:/of the Negrid race.

"We will suck dry Arab oil./They have no food - and no one else has it!/They will happily revert to their sandals and turbans.

"China and Japan will have to fight it out!/Millions will starve in India, Bangledash and whatnot./And all we have to do is: nothing!"

What a world to strive for: 1984 has come and gone but Mr Norman Lowell and his motley crew yearn for a world where the borders are sealed, where the colour of your skin determines whether you live or die, where the haves sit smugly in their citadels, watching the have-nots slowly and painfully starve to death.

Thankfully, Mr Lowell's movement (well, gang) is restricted to a few delusionary adherents who feed on each other. Not so thankfully, there are quite a few others who, because they don't like immigrants (unless they're lap-dancers) think Lowell's thoughts (if I can grace them with this epithet) are worth endorsing.

Which is why the people who matter in this country have to be vigilant and clear in the condemnation of racism in all its forms.

Paying for their research

In Gozo, the people who run the ICM Quickcall enterprise, as I had mentioned to you a few weeks ago, have a rather nifty test going on, where all of Marsalforn has been turned into a wireless hotspot. For the uninitiated, this is a system that allows suitably equipped laptops and PDAs (those little computers) to get online without having to wire themselves into the phone system.

Last time around, I hadn't managed to get online because I tried to do it after office hours, so last weekend, I called in at the right time and got the thing to work.

More precisely, I didn't. I mean, I got on-line for a couple of minutes, and then for a few more minutes and then not at all and then for an hour or so and then off again and on again, so many times that I started sounding like Ludwig and Julie.

If ICM Quickcall think that when they ever get their system up and running, I'm going to go for it, they have another think coming. I appreciate that they are in test mode but I don't appreciate paying them for the privilege of participating in their blinking test, even if it is only a fiver I dropped in the process.

Oy, cousin

Just a few words to one David Borg Cardona, who thinks that having the same surname as me in my real life is something worth mentioning.

As a learned lawyer (your words, not mine) what I must respect is your right to have an opinion, not the opinion itself. In my opinion, your chosen hobby, killing birds, is not an activity of which anyone should have a favourable opinion: your opinion is clearly different. See, I respected your right to have it, but not it.

And please, don't use the phrase "live and let live" when you're trying to justify an activity that involves killing birds, it invokes shades of tautology in the same way the same "Conservationist Hunters" does.

In conclusion, just because an activity is legal doesn't mean right-thinking folk should not strive to have it banned. There is no need to have murder banned, it is illegal already, unless it is birds that are being murdered.

Go take pot-shots at clay-pigeons, why don't you? Like birds, they can't shoot back, but porky columnists can and this one will.

Noshing up

Just to satisfy the craving to which many of my readers seem susceptible, namely hunger-termination, here's a very quick round-up of places to nourish one's self.

The Mill Room in Rabat, Gozo is a new joint with a very interesting menu and an ambience to match. The Chinese Restaurant at the Calypso in Marsalforn deserves a visit and Bonito's in Xlendi serves up excellent food in equally excellent fashion.

There you are, go stuff yourselves: and yes, that's observant of you, we were in Gozo for the weekend.

bocca@waldonet.net.mt