Il Pirata Ristorante
Triq Paceville, St Julian’s
Tel: 2137 5827

Food: 7/10
Service: 10/10
Ambience: 7/10
Value: 8/10
Overall: 8/10

Italian food is something we take for granted. Pasta is as much a part of Maltese culture as it is our national neighbours’. I’m willing to bet the farm that 98 per cent of all homes in Malta have at least one box or bag of pasta in their pantry right now and, if they don’t, it is only due to the recent consumption of said pasta.

So, it is always hard to wrap my head around the fact that outside of our shores and Italy’s, pasta and pizza fall under this sort of exotic ‘Italian cuisine’ label. Whereas to us, it’s just a normal restaurant.

A survey conducted this year revealed that Italian food is the most popular in the world. This comes as little surprise to me as pizza is probably the greatest creation since the big bang itself. Sadly, however, because of its popularity and pervasive permanent presence on an international scale, there are countless cases of Italian food being done wrong.

I remember a particular occasion when travelling through the UK, we stopped off at a cosylooking restaurant somewhere between Nuneaton and Birmingham for a quick bite to eat. We were famished as we sat down to the table and ordered a few pints. A quick look at the menu though and our hearts dropped. It was mostly pasta, which wasn’t the issue at all. The issue lay in the pasta tricolore and penne with ketchup, mustard and mayo.

We necked our drinks, paid for them and walked out of the place with our bellies empty but our dignities intact.

While I am a bit of a pasta purist, I am a lot more forgiving when it comes to pizza. It’s a cultural thing and everyone will stand by their take on it. I’ve had ftira style doughs overladen with toppings as is popular here and I have had thin, flimsy New York-style pizza which I have loved. Detroit-style pan pizza is very similar to our Maxims by-the-slice crap except it is actually delicious and crispy. Heck, I once had a deep-fried calzone in Edinburgh. And I don’t mean the Sicilian-style dough. I mean a calzone that was just deep fried.

You know what, I’ll never forgive them for that, that was one of the worst things I have ever been served and, although deep frying everything is a Scottish cultural habit, please stick to Scotch eggs and Mars bars. Yes, Mars bars. Guilty pleasures, what can I say?

Probably the best pizza I’ve had in Malta

My preferred style of pizza would probably be the ever-popular Neapolitan-style dough. The kind of pizza that has a crust you want your mattress to be made out of. The kind of pizza you order two of because one just never seems like quite enough. The kind of pizza you want to bring home to meet your mother.

I craved one of these pizza recently but I also craved a new experience. I decided to forego my usual haunts and enquire about new places. A glaring realisation hit me. I had never been to Il Pirata. It was time to make amends.

Parking is a nightmare, so we dumped the car in a nearby carpark and saved ourselves the whole song and dance of circling for a spot. We were shown to a table indoors very quickly and the smell of the wood fire oven filled my lungs and warmed my heart. I was ravenous and ready to overorder as I have a tendency to do.

The waiters here are amazing. Our drinks orders were taken and brought in record time, the banter was pleasant and jovial and they functioned like a well-oiled machine. The specials were presented to us and made our decision even harder. My partner and I aren’t crazy about Italian desserts, so we figured ordering an extra starter made perfect sense, don’t judge us.

The first of our starters was a gnocchi in a homemade ragù. I had extremely high expectations for this dish. A good ragù needs six hours to stew and develop depth of flavour, but this sadly had none. It was lacking a good hit of salt and even then it wasn’t enough to impress. The polar opposite could be said of the mushroom risotto. This was the winning dish of the day right off the bat. It was earthy and rich, creamy and vibrant. I wanted to cancel the rest of our orders and just get a dish of this stuff.

Our final starter was a trio of chicken and truffle arancini. I was initially opposed to the idea for a few reasons. First of all, arancini is what you make with leftover risotto (of which we already had ordered) and, secondly, because of the truffle.

I love fresh black truffles but I am vehemently opposed to truffle oils. They tend to be used with a heavy hand and it overpowers everything. I have the taste in my mouth and the smell in my nose for hours afterwards. But I was outvoted so there they were on our table.

And I applaud the chef for the great restraint. The arancini were beautifully crispy and well-seasoned. They went down a treat and I ate my words along with them.

We cleaned the plates in a fairly record time and eagerly awaited our main courses. This is what I had been looking forward to all night and the anticipation was unbearable. We couldn’t have ordered two more different dishes but here was a test of what Il Pirata could really do.

I could smell the lobster linguine before I could see it. It was placed in front of us and my saliva glands kicked into gear. The pasta was awesomely al dente and coated in a viscous bisque that brought a smile to our faces. Sadly, the actual lobster itself was rubbery and overcooked. A massive oversight considering the €26 price tag that accompanied it. Also, the pasta had melded into one solid lump which made romantically Lady and the Tramp-ing it a task that more closely represented two bulldogs eating a peanut butter doughnut.

Finally though, the pièce de résistance, the Pizza con salsicce e friarelli. Sweeping statement: this was probably the best pizza I’ve had in Malta. I know, there are a ton of other places that are excellent but this was perfect. The dough was immaculate from the centrepoint to the crusts, the toppings were abundant without being overbearing and the cheese was divine. I am very, very sad they do not deliver to my front door although my waistline is probably very grateful.

Overall, the meal was exceptionally enjoyable. A few hiccups with the food but the service was good enough that it is quickly forgotten. I will be back a few more times for sure as the waiters informed me that they make a mean tagliata and I have an entire pasta and pizza menu to work through. Nothing deep fried or covered in condiments though.