How Facebook has changed our lives
Amazing how Facebook has changed our lives and our outlook on nearly everything.
We no longer need priests, shamans, mediums or spiritualists. Facebook provides us with a direct line to heaven and to our dear departed. We can now, thanks to Facebook, wish our dear departed, including pets, a happy birthday/father’s day/ mother’s day in heaven.
However, until such time as Facebook finds a solution, it’s a one-way arrangement. The dear departed do not reply. They do not have internet or computers in heaven. They cannot press ‘Like’, which means that mediums and spiritualists can still make a living connecting the living with the dead (pardon the pun).
Facebook has replaced greeting cards. You can now wish your wife/husband or partner or lover/significant other or whoever is lying next to you in bed or sipping coffee across the breakfast table a happy birthday/anniversary and declare to him/her/significant other, your everlasting love and send virtual hugs, without the bother of interrupting whatever you’re doing or the need for physical contact or unnecessary oral communication.
You can also impress your Facebook friends what a devoted son/daughter, husband/wife you are by sending to your nearest and dearest, who may or may not be sitting/lying next to you, messages declaring your undying love, thanking them for being your rock, for always being there for you and for making you the man/woman/person that you are.
Facebook pages such as RUBS have replaced Yellow Pages as the go-to place to look for a product or service, be it domestic appliances, plumbers, electricians, tile layers, restaurants, beauticians, nail technicians, tattooists, botox, breast augmentation, lip enhancement, buttock enhancement.
One can also request suggestions or recommendations, such as where to get a Brazilian butt lift for a more youthful and perky bottom. The list is endless. The product/service has to be tried and tested and those who post suggestions/recommendations are TIA.
But the main purpose of being a Facebook user is to show your Facebook friends what an accomplished world traveller, gourmand, party animal you are by posting photos of yourself, wherever in the world you are giving a peace sign with one hand while holding a glass in the other and putting your tongue out à la Mick Jagger. Your friends will press Like and make pithy comments such as “nice pic”, “beautiful”, “sexy”, “wow”, “epic” or use an emoji if they can’t adequately express themselves. Social networking junkies have been known to break into a cold sweat if they haven’t updated their page in the last 10 minutes and to fall into a deep depression if their posts do not receive enough Likes and comments.
Facebook has its good points but, at a basic level, like most other social media, it runs on misrepresentation – promising connection but creating isolation, promising happiness but instilling fear of being unliked.
John O’Dea – Naxxar
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