Paradise lost...

I would like to share with you an American political joke a friend sent me recently:

"While walking down the street one day, a female senator is tragically hit by a truck and dies. Her soul arrives in heaven and is met by St Peter at the entrance.

" 'Welcome to Heaven,' says St Peter. 'Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts you see, so we're not sure what to do with you.'

" 'No problem, just let me in,' says the lady.

" 'Well, I'd like to, but I have orders from higher up. What we'll do is have you spend one day in Hell and one in Heaven. Then you can choose where to spend eternity.'

" 'Really, I've made up my mind. I want to be in Heaven,' says the senator.

" 'I'm sorry but we have our rules.' And with that, St Peter escorts her to the elevator and she goes down to Hell. The doors open, and she finds herself in the middle of a green golf course.

"In the distance is a club and standing in front of it are all her friends and other politicians who had worked with her. Everyone is very happy. They run to greet her, hug her, and reminisce about the good times they had while getting rich at the expense of the people. They play a friendly game of golf and then dine on lobster and caviar.

"Also present is the Devil, who really is a very friendly guy who has a good time dancing and telling jokes. They are having such a good time that before she realises it, it is time to go. Everyone gives her a big hug and waves while the elevator rises. The elevator goes up, up, up, and the door reopens on Heaven where St Peter is waiting for her. " 'Now it's time to visit Heaven.' So 24 hours pass with the head of state joining a group of contented souls moving from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They have a good time, and before she realises it, the 24 hours have gone by and St Peter returns.

" 'Well then, you've spent a day in Hell and another in Heaven. Now, choose the place where you want to spend eternity.' " She reflects for a minute and then answers:

" 'Well, I would never have said it. I mean Heaven has been delightful, but I think I would be better off in Hell.' "So St Peter escorts her to the elevator, and she goes down, down, down to Hell. Now, the doors of the elevator open, and she is in the middle of a barren land covered with waste and garbage. She sees all her friends, dressed in rags, picking up the trash and putting it in black bags.

The Devil comes over to her and lays his arm on her neck. " 'I don't understand,' stammers the senator. "Yesterday I was here, and there was a golf course and club, and we ate lobster and caviar and we danced and had a great time. Now there is a wasteland full of garbage, and my friends look miserable.' The Devil looks at her, smiles and says, 'Yesterday we were campaigning. Today, you voted for us!' "

More lobster and caviar

An increasing number of people in Malta and Gozo are feeling like the American senator after being hit not by a car but by our post-electoral reality. A few months ago they were taken in by a Nationalist Party campaign that promised them huge funds from the European Union. They were told that the country's finances were in very good shape, that economic prosperity, a new way of doing politics, new civil rights, a better quality of life, a new everlasting spring... were all round the corner... provided that the majority voted again for another five years of Nationalist Party government.

There are people who voted for all this but now feel cheated and betrayed. The huge funds from the EU not only have failed to materialise but we are now told not to expect even meager ones! Taxes and prices of public utilities have gone up, hurting thousands of families and pensioners and making it more difficult for businesses to operate in a viable and sustainable way. People are losing jobs and no fresh investment is coming in to create new ones.

During their personal campaigns to succeed Dr Eddie Fenech Adami as leader of the Nationalist Party, we had three senior ministers (together with the rest of their cabinet colleagues responsible for the wasteland we are in now) promising to turn the country into a lovely golf course where we all play, eat lobster and caviar, and dance happily ever after.

These three contestants identified the problems we face now: unemployment, lack of energy by government to tackle the lack of investment, high taxation and a fairer and efficient government. Whenever the Labour politicians mention these problems, they are accused of being negative and painting a bleak picture. Now the three contestants themselves have confirmed that these problems do exist. In fact they based most of their campaigns on trying to persuade PN councillors that they would address and solve these problems!

The PN leadership campaign where the three contestants promised so much, sounding like a replay of the PN election campaign, itself has probably served to make more people share Charles de Gaulle's cynicism when he said: "Since a politician never believes what he says, he is quite surprised when he is taken at his word!"

Now that the successor has been chosen, we expect him to get on with the job and start delivering. Since the April 2003 election, we have had "Paradise lost"... with the election of Dr Fenech Adami's successor we have been promised "Paradise regained".

That can only happen if jobs are created, new investment flows in, taxes are lowered, families manage to live better, public services in health, education and social welfare improve, the construction of better roads and environmental protection...