‘Teach him and he’ll behave,’ woman told mother of autistic son during tantrum

A simple trip to the supermarket became a moment of heartbreak for Maria Gafa, a mother to two sons on the autism spectrum.

As one of her sons began to throw a tantrum in the checkout line, Maria, who had only bought a few items, timidly asked the woman in front of her if she could allow her to skip ahead. 

The woman's response was a sharp sting: "Teach him and he'll behave. I raised four children and they all behaved," she replied curtly.

Hurt and frustrated, Maria left her items there and walked out of the store in tears.

Neil and Giuseppe, Maria's sons have both found a second home at Inspire, a non-profit organisation dedicated to helping persons with disabilities. 

For Maria, the organisation is more than just a service. 

"To me Inspire means love," she says. "It's welcoming, open to whatever we need, and my sons are doing well, thanks to the professionals there."

Life is a constant battle, she explains, requiring immense preparation for even the simplest outings, like a trip to the beach or a shopping run. Sleep is a luxury, as the boys are often awake by 3.30am.

An unforgettable moment

Yet, through all the difficulties, her children's progress and love are her greatest motivation.

Maria remembers the sheer joy she felt when her youngest, Giuseppe, first called her ‘mummy’. It was an unforgettable moment, a gift she couldn't wait to share with her entire family. 

“I called all my family to tell them what had happened. It was the best gift I could receive,” she said.

Similarly, she recalls Neil's early struggles, like being unable to climb stairs at age four. After just six weeks at Inspire, he had mastered the skill. Today, Neil's world is full of curiosity; he loves animals, science, and computers.

Her sons' strength and resilience also inspire her. She says that sometimes, when she’s crying, Neil would approach her and say: "Don't give up, mummy. Are you OK? You'll be fine, don't give up."

This unwavering love and hope are what keep her going, but a deeper fear lingers in her heart. 

"Before I sleep at night, I worry about what will happen to them if I die," she admits. “I’m preparing them to be independent, together with Inspire and therapists, but the thought nags me, still.”

Maria is among many other parents whose children make use of the invaluable services at Inspire who today are appealing for the public’s donations in a telethon that is being held from 11am to 11pm on all television stations.

The funds will help the NGO expand its services to more people and children who need them, and to continue to help them grow and learn through love and understanding.