James Gunn shows off a beautiful menu of options, each dish made with excitement and topped with comedy only to be served an old and mouldy pasta that looks a lot like the same recipe that shut down the restaurant five years ago.

As franchises go, the quirky and villainous branch that is the Suicide Squad (which forms a small part of the continuously disappointing DC Extended Universe) is certainly a turbulent one. Suicide Squad’s release in 2016 did not bode well for the cast of criminals as not only was the film anti-climactic but also unrememberable; mismanaged from start to finish. But that was in the past. Now we have The Suicide Squad, a title which somehow connotates a sequel by slapping on an article in, what I assume to be, an attempt to create a reboot that only reminds me of the Fast & Furious’ terrible naming schemes. Unfortunately, James Gunn’s attempt at a rebirth has a lot more similarities to the original than just the name.

The Suicide Squad is a rotating covert-ops team of incarcerated villains, each of which have faced fan-favourite foes such as Superman and Batman (mostly off screen for reasons yet to come). In exchange for their cooperation with the American government, these ‘elite’ assassins, thieves, and mutants get years taken off their sentences in the hopes that one day they can break the law again. Some old and some new, these anti-heroes wash up on the shores of Corto Maltese to destroy a top-secret lab that could threaten the world. 

Although I was excited to see what Gunn can do with another group of out-there characters after Marvel’s Guardians of the Galaxy (an enjoyable film that does not live up to itself once re-watched), my expectations were low. I was scared to be excited for what seemed to be a bland re-telling of essentially the same story we saw in 2016, but as Savant (Michael Rooker) is recruited by the stoic mastermind behind the team, Amanda Waller (Viola Davis), I was pleasantly surprised. 

Instead of going through dragging backstories of characters that we have yet to care about, Gunn tells the story from first-timer Savant’s perspective, diving into the action as quick jokes create chemistry and an exciting soundtrack creates tension. Actors such as Flula Borg and Pete Davidson blend into the chaotic world surprisingly well, embodying the oxymoronic mix between cool and cringe; comedy somewhere in the middle. The introduction ends with a bang, stopping the fun and starting the two hours of tedium.

Nice to see Kirk found his way out of Stars Hollow… Sean Gunn. Photo: Warner Bros. Pictures

After the exciting opener, the film does a complete U-turn and starts to head back to its predecessor in search for advice. Everything that was fun about the first 15 minutes turns into a repetitive slog of bland characters, cringy dialogue, and a crude soundtrack that isn’t afraid to play Sad Dramatic Overture 1 anytime there is the slightest bit of emotion on screen, ruining the moment instantly. I found myself struggling to listen to Bloodsport (Idris Elba) and Peacemaker (John Cena) squabbling like 14-year-olds as they pranced ‘stealthily’ through the forest, the latter wearing a bright red shirt and the most-polished helmet known to man; the careful joining of silliness and sobriety that elevated my expectations now shattered.

It quickly became obvious why all these characters talk about their exploits with such pride but have never been seen before. Around halfway through the film, the Squad find themselves undercover in a bus, bonding with one another. With nothing of interest to say, they share their backstories, each one accompanied with the afore mentioned soundtrack. When asked why he hates rats so much, Bloodsport reminisces on his youth and how his father locked him in a cage filled with rodents. Instead of building a complex character, we get a lifeless stereotype surrounded by other carbon copies.

The film isn’t all bad. Towards the third quarter there is a well-choreographed fight scene with some colourful cinematography that finally adds visual depth to Harley Quinn (Margot Robbie), yet that vibrance quickly dissipates for an awkward conversation that never seemed to end. The Suicide Squad has left me with many questions: why have the best characters disappear after the first 10 minutes; do we really need a whole explanation as to why someone would be terrified of rats; but the question that will stick in my mind as the others fade away is, simply, why?

The Suicide Squad is currently showing in select cinemas.