I stare at the mirror. I have been standing there for the past hour. Just staring and brooding. I don’t like what I see. In fact, it is not just about not liking, but actually hating what I see.

I am too big and feel so helpless because I have been dieting for months now and the person I see in the mirror has not changed. I have been weighing myself several times a day too, but there has been no result and no change. I feel exasperated.

Why can’t I be beautiful and perfect? Why do I have to live in this ugly body that will never change, even though I starve myself every day?

I hate every single part of my body. There is nothing I feel remotely comfortable with. I hate being with people and I hate going to the beach. Everywhere I look, I see beautiful people. Each one of them seems like they’re stepping out of a magazine. I feel like I need to hide. I wish I could just vanish. So I stay home, in my bed, because that is the best place to be when you are the owner of such a disgusting body.

Parents, teachers and guardians should teach young people to love their bodies from when they are young, no matter their shape and size

This is a classic example of the thought processes of people with body image issues. This thinking is widespread among both men and women, and the pain these people go through every day is indescribable. The messages we receive about our body stick to us like glue and we grow up thinking that our body image defines who we are.

Unfortunately, body shaming has become very common from a very tender age. Sometimes, it is the crux of severe bullying. Some people are stigmatised, while others become outcasts. These people suffer in total silence. They try to take it, but it simply breaks them inside and they spiral into depression.

Due to this, a lot of people develop eating disorders from a very young age. Some try to starve themselves, while others do the opposite and overeat. What they all have in common is a distorted self-image and thought process about how they look or how they should look.

These distorted thought processes are also visible in very young children. Young children are already aware of how they should look or weigh not to be an outcast or be bullied. Some young people believe that if they do not have a certain weight, then they are overweight because that is what they are told by their friends.

It’s heartbreaking to see this trend kicking in at such a vulnerable stage. It can be so destructive to the child’s self-esteem and self-image. It can destroy self-worth and young people start to define themselves by the numbers on weighing scales. Parents, teachers and guardians should teach young people to love their bodies from when they are young, no matter their shape and size.

Tell them that they are beautiful and loved on a regular basis. Do not body shame or constantly criticise what they eat. Teach them that balance is key and that food is good. It only needs to be consumed in a healthy and balanced way.

For those who wish to make a change in lifestyle, there is nothing wrong with working out at the gym or with a trained professional. Ultimately, we all strive to improve holistically. There is no shame in that.

Every child, teenager and adult is beautiful in their own way. Teach them to celebrate their beauty and embrace their uniqueness and help them develop a sense of pride in who they are and who they will become. “You are beautiful.” “You are unique.” “You are loved.” “If only you can see yourself in the same way that I see you.” “If only you could be happy with who you are.” “Just look in the mirror, smile and embrace the person who is smiling back at you.”

Isabelle Anastasi is a warranted counsellor.