Forget the joys of travel. They belong to a different era. We live now in testing times, not least when you need to be tested prior to boarding an international flight.
Logically, the departure ‘window’ of 72 hours should start the moment you’ve taken the test. But, apparently, the results (if and when they arrive) don’t indicate that, which seems rather odd. I have even heard that the 72 hours start ticking once you’ve received the result (Date of postmark or e-mail? When landing on the doormat?). Opinion and practice are divided on that. And it transpires that even those 72 hours can vary according to airline or travel destination.
Then there’s the all-important matter of boarding and landing: a situation that keeps you grounded at the departure gate if the 72 hours are going to run out by the time you should have landed. So, what happens if your flight is delayed? And what about time spent queuing at the destination, negotiating passport control and then waiting for your PCR test to be validated? Is the clock still ticking against you? On top of that, if you’re heading from the UK, there’s the small matter of the one-hour time difference, which may seem insignificant but could be crucial.
Finally, the vagaries of the postal service because if you’ve bought a ‘do it yourself’ test-kit (costing roughly between €75 and €125) you have first to mail it and wait for it to reach the recipient. That’s 24 hours at least, plus whatever the turnaround at the lab happens to be. Besides, mail isn’t delivered over the weekend. So what happens if you are catching a flight on, say, Monday night or Tuesday morning?
Damned if you do, damned if you don’t.
If you do your test too early, you risk being told that your 72-hour window has expired. On the other hand, since it takes 48 hours (or longer) for test results to be issued, you risk cutting it fine if you leave matters later than that. I have even heard of people who received their test results five minutes after check-in closed and were denied boarding and royally screwed. As if COVID-19 wasn’t enough.
Do they really need to keep torturing us like this? One begins to wonder whether the airline has a vested interest in making you a ‘no-show’ and then selling you a new ticket on the next flight.
Faced with the imminent departure of my son from the UK, I have spent the last two days counting backwards and am still not sure where he stands. Memories of horrible maths homework came flooding back this week although, unlike my Harwood Clarke mathematics textbook, which magically and unequivocally gave all the answers (at the back!), it appears there is no right answer to this particular sum. Being ‘reliably’ informed that my son would need to take the test at least three days before boarding did not cut the mustard. And I’ve since abandoned that advice.
I have even heard of people who received their test results five minutes after check-in closed and were denied boarding- Michela Spiteri
Yes, it’s straight out of that mustard and black Clarke textbook – or, rather, it’s not. Back in those days, you see, the problem was a cyclist setting off at exactly 10am to a point exactly 18 kilometres away at a speed of exactly 20km/h, only to get a puncture and be forced to walk the rest of the journey at exactly 8km/h. You’d be asked to calculate how far the cyclist had ridden before getting the puncture, if he arrived, finally, at exactly 1.10pm.
Thirty-seven odd years ago, I’d stare blankly at the problem, then at my exercise book and will the answer. But no spark, no inspiration, ever came. At 8pm, after hours of incarceration and me in tears, my father would waltz into the room and, in 60 seconds, come up with the elusive answer. He’d laugh and then tell me that it was English I didn’t understand, not maths. Today, I still wouldn’t be able to tell you the answer.
Even so, proof of a negative test exactly 72 hours prior to departure seems simple enough (mathematically and linguistically). So why then are hundreds of people being denied boarding at airports? Obviously, the ‘reality’ is not as simple as it looks and it’s no wonder that desperate and/or unscrupulous people are forging PCR test results. Because, even when you genuinely want to do the right thing, you are at the mercy of COVID-19 cowboys – test providers who are clearly seizing the chance to cash in on long-term confusion and last-minute panic and anxiety.
What seems to be happening is that test results are being sent ‘late’ and passengers are being told that the 72-hour window cannot be guaranteed unless they cough up for the premium package.
What’s so special about the test? It’s not rocket science. The standard laboratory turnaround is simply between 12 and 24 hours. What additional delays can there be?
Call me cynical if you like but it’s starting to look like there’s one great big PCR rip off going on. Why can’t you do a PCR test at the airport, reasonably and cheaply and have the peace of mind that you will be allowed to board?
Failing that, every airline should provide its own in-house service giving passengers the exact time, date and place to book their tests and make their flights on time. That would indeed be taking a leaf out of Clarke!
And, unlike the cyclist, no one would be taken for a ride because the COVID-19 testers would have to answer now to the airlines. Coming home shouldn’t have to be so testing... and trying.
