The signs are there to be seen all around us if we care to look. Reports suggest that Maltese society has become angrier, public discussion has become coarser, while social media is awash with deliberate and ugly abuse, name calling and frequent hate speech.

We might readily attribute much of this to a culture increasingly uninterested in care or context, fact or detail, thoughtful expression or generosity.

We seem to prefer to speak in our own echo chambers, with instant and often ill-considered outbursts or tweets instead of understanding.

Public life has become little better, with political leaders, business elites, media commentators and celebrities outdoing each other to obtain publicity and often notoriety (or ‘likes’) regardless of human cost. Everyday situations and commentary are routinely knee jerk and driven by superlatives and hyperbole devoid of substantive content.

We ‘discuss’ with loudhailers and capital letters as if this in some magical way strengthens our argument. Rant and rhetoric are routinely given pride of place over the most basic reasoning.

In such a scenario, no-one gains, we all lose. The methodology of engaging in discussion and debate to win others over to our viewpoint or position simply does not work.

Speaking over others and being the loudest, name calling and personal abuse, and thumping the keyboard with capital letters do little or nothing for public conversation and most likely contribute to its opposite. It builds distrust, rejection and even hostility.

Responding to others in a knee-jerk fashion or with only gut reactions and feelings is counterproductive.

It not only short-changes us but many others too.

It demeans and undermines our own argument or position. It not only reveals a lack of self-awareness and appropriate humility but also basic moral courage.

To talk across diverging opinions, expand our own thinking and build areas of common interest, we need to begin with the basics. We need to talk together so we actually hear and understand each other.

We need to acknowledge the need for a set of basic ground rules such as actively listening and not constantly interrupting, sticking to the issues under review, and refraining from attacking or abusing others.

We need also to avoid jumping to conclusions about an argument, person or group, trying instead to comprehend the rationale or motivation for another’s argument and asking genuine questions about what they have written or said.

Perhaps most importantly of all, we need to communicate to be understood, and not, as so many do, to grandstand or rant or sound superior.

Being open and honest and speaking from your own considered point of view is likely to deliver better results. Beginning to understand the mindset of others is also crucial and builds mutual respect and even empathy.

Above all, we should avoid deliberately trying to hurt or damage others.

We would do well to be mindful of the language we use, the keywords or values we invoke and the general tone of our contributions. We need to avoid stereotyping and prejudice and be prepared to challenge others likewise while avoiding real or imaginary power games.

None of this implies we should simply abandon our own beliefs, values and principles but that we recognise the same need in others.

Above all, we need to think about what we are doing or saying or implying, even to finally agree to disagree. This is basic to any discussion or debate in almost any context.

While recognising that many engage in public ‘debate’ for entirely negative or dishonest reasons, that should not grant us licence to do likewise.

In thinking about the year ahead, we would do well to attempt to contribute positively to public conversations by considering some of the above arguments.