Last week, we gathered to celebrate the life of Maureen, my brother’s wife and to mourn her passing. 

It was a simple, yet typical event replicated thousands (if not millions) of times daily across the world.  An opportunity for assessment, affirmation, and reflection.

Our family and friends were lucky to be able to do so in everyday circumstances rather than in those marked by war, terror, or disaster.   

That remains a privilege for many but by no means all.  A privilege to pause and think even for the briefest of moments when our emotions are at the forefront. 

Gathering to remember the late Maureen (pictured) offered Colm a moment to reflect on some of the fundamentals of being human.

Such an event marks a chance to reflect not just on the life of the person who has passed but also on our own ongoing journeys in life.  Our focus was on Maureen and what she brought to our lives and those of others. 

Simultaneously we inevitably focused on ourselves, on what is important to us in life and what human traits, strengths, and weaknesses we possess and how we use them.

In this respect, Maureen offered us a moment to reflect on some of the fundamentals of being human in today’s world.  Vitally necessary but routinely neglected or ignored moments, here in Malta as much as elsewhere.  In many ways, they are the stuff that defines us as humans.

Maureen reminded us once again of the importance of family, not just that immediate and known family but that broader family that exists around and beneath us. 

The family we vaguely know but seldom acknowledge.

Moments such as these generate challenging questions such as Who and what am I and what is it I stand for?  While at the surface level such questions appear banal, when pondered they are anything but; they approach the core of our identity at so many levels. 

A key related question follows - What is my place in the world that is immediately before me but also that which stretches out beyond me? 

In that wider world what are my obligations and duties and to whom? 

As a teacher of issues related to human rights or environmental justice for instance, I am routinely involved in discussing and debating these questions.  My experience to date suggests that we are anything but practised in engaging with such questions, we often find ourselves at a loss to satisfactorily answer them. 

This is especially so in the context of the key existential issues that face us – discrimination, inequality, climate change, conflict etc. 

Our inability to see ourselves as part of history, of community and society at large, often disempowers us and so we avoid difficult and discomforting questions. 

For me, this reflects an inadequate ability to assess and exercise our own power and agency whether it be in our immediate vicinity or more broadly. 

Maureen compelled us to write a memo to ourselves on such issues.

To protect us against discomfort, hurt, pain, anxiety, and uncertainty, we routinely close off many of our sensibilities retreating behind apparent certitude. 

This can have the cumulative effect of limiting our understanding of ourselves and others to our disadvantage.  It also can constrain our curiosity about the world around us, and of our relationship with that world. 

Like so many others in all our lives, Maureen accompanied us but briefly. 

She held up a mirror in which many reflections can be seen. 

She reminded us that we share not just the concept of life together, but also its realities, even if we choose to ignore that fact.