I’ve been trying desperately hard not to catch any of the women’s European Championships over the past 10 days or so. But before you get on your high horse and slam me for being sexist, this has absolutely nothing to do with Euro 22 being a tournament for ladies rather than men.

It is purely because I already watch enough football of the male variety – Premiership, European, Championship, cup, international, friendlies, Sunday league – and absolutely don’t need to develop a similar addiction to the women’s side of the beautiful game.

The day I inform my infinitely patient wife that I can’t do something because I am busy watching Sheffield United women vs Crystal Palace women on the television is, coincidentally, exactly the same day I will be moving out of home. And as that would be entirely understandable, I was determined to hold back.

However, despite my best efforts, I still accidentally (ahem) tuned in to two or three of the bigger games… and thoroughly, if slightly guiltily, enjoyed every single minute of them.

One match I just happened to stumble across was England’s 8-0 demolition of Norway. What an incredible, record-breaking performance that was. The skill, tactics, effort and energy shown by England were first class as they barely gave their opponents a kick of the ball with a display of attacking ruthlessness. (Gareth Southgate, you’d better have been taking notes…)

It’s not hard to see why England women, with home advantage, are one of the favourites to lift this trophy. But I’m sure that Spain and possibly Holland and France will have something to say about that as the competition moves into the knockout phase.

A knockout phase that I will categorically, absolutely, unquestionably not be watching. The thought hadn’t even entered my mind.

Absolving the fans

So it turns out Liverpool fans weren’t responsible for the fiasco that unfolded at the Champions League final a couple of months ago.

Quelle surprise!

The French Senate concluded a double investigation into the match last week and laid the blame for the chaos at the feet of the French government, the Paris Police and UEFA itself. Of course, that will be of little consolation to those Liverpool fans who were robbed, tear-gassed and had what should have been a joyous experience turned into an utter nightmare. And who then, to rub salt into the wound, got blamed for whole thing.

I said at the time the Liverpool fans were being treated as scapegoats for a complete failure of organisation, planning and foresight. And that is exactly what has been proven to be the case.

Some powerful heads in France should roll for this – if not for failing to organise the event properly, then for trying to pin the blame for that failure on honest, genuine fans.

A freaky but welcome result

I know it’s been a rather disappointing few years for Manchester United fans but they shouldn’t allow last Tuesday’s thrashing of Liverpool to go to their heads.

Yes, it was a great result, and a rather unexpected one at that. Equally I don’t agree with those writing it off as a mere pre-season warm-up: another two teams, maybe, but when these clubs meet it is always going to be a bit more than a friendly.

Even so, the reality is that this 4-0 victory will mean nothing when the proper season gets under way in a few weeks. If those two teams were to go head-to-head in a competitive match tomorrow, the outcome would be very different. Just as it would have been if Liverpool’s players hadn’t had a bizarre ‘who can hit the post the most’ competition going on between them.

However, what this result should do is give United fans belief that this season won’t be as depressing as the last; and that there is some hope for the future; and that Erik ten Hag may have a viable plan. That is, in itself, considerable progress.

Rooney taking a break?

Wayne Rooney insisted last week that taking over at DC United was not a ‘backwards step’ in his managerial career. The former Manchester United and England player is set to become head coach at the same American club he turned out for towards the end of his playing days.

Although I can see why he would want the job, familiarity with the set-up and a dash of sentimentality spring instantly to mind, I think in his heart he must know this is not the sort of managerial position that will truly test his overall skills. That’s not being disrespectful, just honest.

As manager of Derby County during one of the most tumultuous periods in their history, he learned football the hard way – the club was in administration, had a transfer ban and a points deduction.

Compared to that, DC United will be walk in the park. Although the team are currently second bottom of the Eastern Conference and were recently beaten 7-0, his job in America will be coaching, not managing.

Of course, that is not to say this move isn’t exactly what he needs.

After the chaos of Derby, which ultimately ended in relegation, some time in America honing his coaching skills might be perfect for his all-round development. Less worrying about transfers and finances and more fucus on things happening on the pitch.

But, strictly in terms of managerial experience, going from DCFC to DCU is most definitely not a step up.

E-mail: james@quizando.com

Twitter: @Maltablade