A grandfather talks to his young grandson and advises him that he has two wolves inside of him, each struggling with the other. The first is the wolf of kindness, of peace and also love. The other is the wolf of fear, greed and hate.
The young boy is fascinated and asks his grandfather, “Which wolf will win the struggle?”
The grandfather replies “whichever one you feed.”
This traditional Native American story was updated by the US theatre writing team of Rodgers and Hammerstein in their musical South Pacific. Their song You’ve got to be carefully taught concludes with this:
‘You've got to be taught before it's too late,
Before you are six or seven or eight,
To hate all the people your relatives hate,
You've got to be carefully taught!’
From birth we are drip-fed the stories, traditions, myths, experiences and prejudices of our families, communities and cultures. Like others everywhere, I have not been immune to this, growing up as I did in Ireland within a very narrow nationalism and a twisted Catholicism. This narrow worldview was deepened and reinforced through my formal schooling.
It took many years and experiences later in life to realise that only half the lies I had been told were true. The rest were, at best, half-truths. Unprocessed, such half-truths possess the ability to embitter, deform and damage. Let loose, they can be lethal, as we have learned to our cost throughout history.
Some more than others.
Seldom do societies expend as much energy in dismantling half-truths and lies as they do in encouraging and nurturing them. Much of Europe is currently in a nurturing phase.
I have been reminded of all this once again while watching the horrific images of ongoing attacks on migrants in our surrounding seas and while observing the vomit-inducing ‘commentaries’ on social media.
What is it that fuels such hate against those who have been short-changed by history, economics and geography?
Why is it that those of us born here in Europe in life’s game of absolute chance feel so entitled to abuse others not so lucky? What is it that allows us to use our inherited privilege to deny even the lives of others let alone their basic dignity?
From whence comes this loathing? Because it cannot be from those who, by definition, we do not know - and will most likely never know - and who have done us no harm. What is it within us that gives license to this evil?
Why is it that we allow our societies across Europe to fail with respect to even the most minimum standards of care and protection? Why do we not even attempt to come up with a fair and reasonable plan that respects and protects?
Where has this negative and destructive component of our personality as a people come from, why do we feel entitled to give it full vent? Why are we so maladjusted to today’s realities? Why can we not even imagine initiating and maintaining a different relationship? Why our constant aggression and deviant behaviour from the norms we profess to believe?
Why is our self-esteem so confused, so guilty, so low? Why are we incapable of imagining a better version of ourselves?
The animosity, resentment and hate that is now so visible are not emotions that come naturally or automatically, they are traits and behaviours that must be carefully tended. Why do we remain silent so often in the face of the barbarism currently being let loose?
Why, in the words of poet Seamus Heaney do we continue to suck 'the fake taste, the stony flavours of those sanctioned, old, elaborate retorts’ while simultaneously practising the excuse ‘whatever you say, say nothing.’