Clear and accurate communication remains a cornerstone of public policy. Ensuring the public is fully aware and briefed about the government’s ideas, plans and vision is vital in a modern democracy.
To this end, the government has commissioned no fewer than 10 public relations companies to undertake a communication campaign on a variety of new big initiatives that will place Malta at the forefront of modern government and leadership in Europe.
Under the slogan of ‘A Malta made for your children’, the government has embarked on a bold strategy of using the science of billboarding to promote economic and social development. The project is the brainchild of a strategic think tank involving political leaders and PR specialists.
The initial billboard was launched today by the prime minister. He announced a ‘nearly ready’ new Maltese metro system – one that embraces the very latest in public transport technology and planning.
‘We are reaching for nothing short of the sky’ was the key message at the launch of the billboard just outside Valetta.
The PM noted that the country had, once again become the envy of Europe for its wide-sweeping initiatives, especially those related to the science and technology of concrete. Responding to questions from journalists, the PM noted that the considerable excavation debris generated by the metro (and Gozo tunnel) project would feed directly into an even more visionary billboard project to be announced later.
Key members of the cabinet were absent from the launch, as they are currently away on official business advising other governments on issues as diverse as environmental sustainability, the use of consultancies in political life and in Malta’s traditional strength - the rule of law.
The newly installed Minister for Concrete later launched a second billboard, announcing the setting up of the European Institute for Concrete at the soon-to-be-established Russian University of Malta. He noted that this far-seeing billboard initiative was based on Malta’s proven track record on all aspects of concrete.
The minister hinted that another such institute was also in the offing, this time focused on the promotion of independent media investigation and reporting. The government is currently working on this initiative in partnership with institutions in Russia, Azerbaijan and Turkey.
The third billboard project launched today was the most visionary and far-seeing; described by the Government as an ‘epoch-defining project’.
The billboard announced the building of a ring road motorway around the islands of Malta and Gozo. Using soon-to-be-revealed technology, the ring road will be built on concrete pylons set deep in the ocean’s bed.
The motorway would immediately eliminate any hint of traffic congestion and represents a unique opportunity for Maltese concrete and tourism, with visitors travelling from afar to marvel at the cutting-edge project.
The Office of the Prime Minister confirmed that the billboard ring road represented the biggest infrastructure project ever imagined for the country. Other countries worldwide were said to be in ‘awe’ of the visionary capability of the Maltese government’s billboards.
With little sense of irony, a government spokeswoman claimed that the project announced on the billboard was "concrete evidence" that only this government could be trusted to lead not just Malta, but Europe overall.
Following a clamour from journalists, the PM refused to comment on rumours that he has been asked to immediately take over the role of President of the European Commission, saying in a later tweet "We’ve been there before, and we know how that worked out."
In response, the Opposition said it would be launching its own billboard projects in time for the upcoming election.
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