The reopening of schools amid a pandemic is stressing out some parents and this heightened anxiety could also be harmful to children.
Very often, children sense and mirror their parents’ feelings, meaning they too could become anxious about returning to school, psychotherapist Daniel Mercieca told Times of Malta.
“Parents can either support their anxious child or make the situation worse. Telling their child not to worry, avoiding the issue, or just reassuring them that all will be OK will not help.
“Children's anxiety is not resolved if they do not go to school, meet friends or go to the playground. Avoidance actually increases anxiety,” he said.
Instead, acknowledging the fear, helping them relax and face their fears is much more helpful. Parents can be compassionate and teach them how to recognise between real and hypothetical worries, while younger children can also be helped through play and by talking about their worries.
According to a poll published on Sunday, there are more people who believe children should steer away from schools amid the COVID-19 outbreak than those who think classrooms should reopen.
State school parents have already expressed their concern about the reopening of schools, saying it is “premature” considering the high number of COVID-19 cases. Both unions representing teachers have also urged the government to keep schools closed.
Mercieca was speaking to Times of Malta ahead of an online workshop that he will be moderating for parents to help children aged up to 12 years deal with worry and anxiety.
Worrying is normal. In fact, Mercieca says, worrying is our brain’s way of keeping us safe.
“The pandemic has triggered worry and anxiety in many of us because we are continuously learning new things about the virus, we don’t know when it could strike us personally and we don’t know when it will all be over.
“It is ok to be worried. What is important is that we show children that they can talk to us when they are worried.”
Not all children will be able to tell their parents that they are worried in as many words. Some will say ‘it feels like I have something heavy inside of me’ and parents can ask them to draw what they are feeling so that they are better able to understand them.
How can you tell that a child is anxious?
Different children will act differently, however, changes in routine or behaviour are a very good indicator.
When they are anxious, children who usually tend to be focused and organised, will seem more flustered and frustrated and have a shorter attention span, so they would not be able to finish reading a book, for example.
Children who are very energetic would suddenly prefer staying indoors playing on their PC, while others might over- or undereat.
Parents should also look out for sleeping patterns. Children experience attachment issues when they wake up or go to sleep. An anxious child might ask his parents to sleep in their same room as they are too cold in theirs, for example.
Look up LYNC Co-op on Facebook, or email lynccoopmalta@gmail.com for more information about the workshops.